PERFECTIONISM AND RUGS

Perfectionism is the belief that if we do things perfectly and look perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgment, and shame. (Brené Brown)

The idea of perfectionism has been coming up a lot for me lately not only because life has been less than perfect BUT also because as I dive deeper into my anti-racism work, I am learning that perfectionism and wanting to get it “right” is quality or attribute of white supremacist thinking and behavior. 

While I like to think of myself as a recovering perfectionist - boy do I still have a major need to get things “right”.  

I remember when we were carpet shopping in Morocco, all of the rugs in the shop had a small imperfection or break from the pattern. When I asked why all these rugs were messed up and demanded a “symmetrical” one 🤣(yes, I really did that) our lovely rug guide reminded me they they create imperfections on purpose. 

“Perfection is only possible for God”, he said. 

Oh.

Phew... 

The rug seller said that the only perfect rugs you’ll find are the inauthentic ones. The FAKES!! 

Perfectionism stems from the need to hide certain aspects of ourselves AND to amplify or highlight only certain attributes or virtues. So to project ourselves as infallible is dishonest and lacks authenticity. 

Projecting perfection is not about being perceived as having no faults, instead it’s about hidings said faults. In that way perfectionism is vague and uninteresting. Hiding aspects of ourselves is exhausting and none of us got time for that... 

Perfectionism and Rugs